Donna, are you… are you my… are you my best friend?
Of course.
What is it, Laura? What's wrong?
I'm your friend always.
But sometimes lately I feel that you don't wanna be around me
because I'm so uptight.
No, I am uptight.
I mean…
I'm your friend no matter what way you are.
You know,
even when I just think about your face, I get happier.
Come on.
Do you wanna talk?
No, I wanna smoke.
I'm really in a mess today too.
I'm thinking about doing it with Mike.
Mike's the man, right?
Well, what do you think?
Donna, you're such a crack-up.
You don't even like Mike.
Is this way your way of showing to me that you're not uptight?
This is about sex, not like.
Mom, Laura's here,
and I think I'll have one of those huckleberry muffins.
You want a muffin?
If I can smoke it.
Do you want a muffin?
Donna, you are a muffin.
Ipso facto.
The red rose.
Where's the red rose?
Oh, that's so embarrassing.
You know the light at Sparkwood and 21?
It worked right there. I just did it right there.
Why is it you can't smoke in your home,
I'm a doctor and don't allow smoking in my home,
and I let you smoke in my home?
- Because you love me so much? Heh-heh.
I do love you,
you little smoking whippersnapper.
I want you to know that I put seven whole huckleberries in each muffin.
Mm.
What the hell is this?
It's a prescription.
Uh, this isn't a prescription.
It's a secret message for Laura.
"The angels will return,
and when you see the one that's meant to help you,
you will weep with joy."
I'll get it.
Hello?
Yeah, she's right here, Leland.
Laura, it's for you. It's your father.
Hello?
Okay.
I gotta go home.
I'll walk you out.
See you tomorrow.
Okay.
Bye, sweetie.
You okay?
Goodbye, muffin.
No, you're the muffin.
No, Donna, you're right.
I'm the muffin!
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
Hi, honey.
How's Donna?
Fine.
School?
School's fine.
Sit down.
Are you hungry?
Not really.
Hmm.
You didn't wash your hands before you sat down to dinner, did you?
Let me see.
Dad.
Oh, these hands are filthy.
Look.
There's dirt way under this fingernail.
- Leland, what are you doing? - Look at this finger.
- Leland… - Laura did not wash her hands
before dinner.
- Oh, look at this. - Don't.
LELAND: Oh.
Is it from a lover?
Did you get this from your lover?
They don't call them"lovers" in high school, Leland.
Bobby didn't give you this.
How do you know that Bobby didn't give her that?
LELAND: Did Bobby give you this?
Or is there someone new?
SARAH: Leland.
Leave her alone. Don't do that. She doesn't like that.
How do you know what she likes?
Stop it!
Now, you sit down,
and we'll all have dinner.
Oh, I'll sit down.
But not a one of us is going to start eating
until Laura washes her hands.
Wash your hands.
[LAURA CRYING]
[CRYING]
What is it, Leland?
[DOOR OPENS]
Laura, honey.
I love you.
I love you so much.
Dad.
Good night, princess.
[CRYING]
[WHISPERS] Is it true?
[SNAPS]
Don't take the ring, Laura.
Don't take the ring.
My name is Annie.
I've been with Dale and Laura.
The good Dale is in the lodge,
and he can't leave.
Write it in your diary.
[GASPS]
Someone who knows how to clean
knows where the object was before she started cleaning,
and then that object goes back to the same exact spot.
Shelly, I know where everything in this house is.
Sometimes on the road, I mentally go through this whole house
and picture where every item is.
Lay off the bennies, Leo.
Anybody can clean the surface of an object,
but dirt can find its way anywhere.
To really clean, you have to scrub below the surface.
Where the dirt is, Shelly!
That's one thing you're gonna learn, how to clean.
It takes scrubbing, Shelly.
There is no easy way.
This is where we live, Shelly!
As if I didn't know.
I'm gonna show you how to wash this, and then you're gonna do it.
Come off it, Leo. I need to get ready for work.
What did you say?
Shelly, I'm not fooling around anymore!
First thing you got to learn is good attitude.
That's the key. Anybody will tell you that.
Ow!
Don't even think about going anywhere.
I'm not finished with you.
LEO [OVER PHONE]: Yeah? - Leo, Bobby.
What are you doing calling me here?
I'm sorry. Um…
The football's empty. I'm looking for Santa Claus.
No way. You already owe me money.
- Five thousand, to be exact. - [MOUTHS] Five thousand?
Leo Johnson,
are you telling me there's no Santa Claus?
[PHONE RINGING]
Yeah, Roadhouse.
Jacques, Bobby.
I need some things, man.
Heh.
How come you only call me when you're desperate?
You desperate, baby?
Are you interested or not?
Yeah, maybe, Bobby, baby.
Maybe. Heh.
For 10 K, I have a friend who has what you want.
Oh, his stuff is the best.
Hit me.
Two days, midnight,
at the sound of sawing wood.
[CHUCKLES]
Jacques, you crazy fucking Canadian.
This sounds big.
Joey just called in.
Bernie the mule left Canada about an hour ago.
Okay.
That means we stop watching Jacques,
set a trap for Bernie.
He's coming in on foot.
That's right, Andy.
I guess you're saying there's an awful lot of trails for us to cover, hmm?
No, I was thinking what a long hike Bernie has to take.
I'll get on it.
Thank you, Andy.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
DONNA: Laura?
Laura?
Where you going?
Nowhere fast.
And you're not coming.
Laura, come on.
You remember me? I'm your best friend.
Laura…
…aren't you gonna fix me a drink?
Where are the cookies?
You mean Fred and Ginger?
Dancing.
If I had a nickel for every cigarette your mom smoked,
I'd be dead.
I'll call you tomorrow.
DONNA: Laura.
Laura.
We couldn't get any warmer.
- Mm. - Ahem.
What are you playing? I don't think I recognize that.
It's a tune called P-P-P-P-T-B.
It's a portable, uh, breath tester. Harry gave it to me. What's it say?
It says you can't even walk. Ha, ha.
Oh.
Well, looks like we're gonna be here for a long time.
Let's find something good on the radio.
So far away.
God, that's beautiful.
It's you and me, Ed.
You can barely hear us.
Ed,
do you think we're lucky,
or just a terrible accident?
Sweetheart, I think we're so lucky.
I think
we're one great big giant
smash-up.
[CAR DOOR CLOSES]
When this kind of fire starts, it is very hard to put out.
The tender bows of innocence burn first,
and the wind rises.
And then
all goodness is in jeopardy.
WOMAN [SINGING]: Why did you go?
Why did you turn
Away from me?
When all the world
Seemed to sing
Why
Why did you go?
Was it me?
Was it you?
Questions in a world
Of blue
How can a heart
That's filled with love
Start to cry?
When all the world
Seemed so right
How
How can love die?
Was it me?
Was it you?
Questions in a world
Of blue
When did the day
With all its light
Turn into night?
When all the world seemed to…
So you wanna fuck the homecoming queen?
[TOMMY CHUCKLES]
BUCK: Let's go around the world, babe.
This isn't gonna get you to Walla Walla.
BUCK: You do go all the way, don't you, little girl?
Sooner or later.
You willing to go all the way, huh?
You gonna do it to me?
[BUCK GRUNTS]
DONNA: Let's boogie.
What the hell are you doing?
Are you part of the deal?
No, she isn't.
[SONG ENDS]
[CROWD APPLAUDING]
What did you say your name was?
Buck.
That was really nice, Buck.
Yeah. Ha-ha-ha.
Okay, Donna.
Let's go.
Yeah!
All right, I didn't even spill my beer.
Everybody's coming. Ow!
Yeah!
No.
Heh. Hey, Tommy.
Jacques beat us here.
Hold on, I'm choking the farm fed.
Come on, let's go inside.
Woo-hoo!
Hey, Laura. How's it going?
Hey, Dennis.
[LAUGHS]
[MIMICS GUNSHOT]
[LAUGHING]
Yeah.
[LAUGHS THEN WHOOPS]
RONETTE:
LAURA:
No! Donna!
Donna!
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
Get off her.
Don't ever wear my stuff! Don't ever wear my stuff! Never!
DONNA: I won't wear your stuff. - Jacques, help me get her home now!
- Tommy! - I'm not gonna wear your stuff.
LAURA: Donna, not you.
Mr. Jeffries?
Here's your key, Mr. Jeffries.
I hope you enjoy your stay here at the Palm Deluxe.
Oh.
Gracias.
Do you have a Miss Judy staying here by any chance?
This is for you.
The young lady, she left it for you.
Gordon, it's 10:10 a. m. on February 16th.
I was worried about today because of the dream I told you about.
Gordon?
Phillip, is that you?
Phillip?
GORDON: Cooper, meet the long-lost Phillip Jeffries.
You may have heard of him from the academy.
Well, now,
I'm not going to talk about Judy.
In fact, we're not going to talk about Judy at all.
Gordon.
I know, Coop. Stand fast.
Who do you think this is there?
Suffered some bumps on the old noggin, eh Phil?
What the hell did he say, Albert?
That's Special Agent Dale Cooper.
Where in the hell have you been, Jeffries?
I sure as hell wanna tell you everything.
But I haven't got a whole lot to go on.
But I will tell you one little bitty thing.
Judy is positive about this.
How interesting. I thought we were gonna leave Judy out of it.
Albert.
Sit down, Jeffries.
Hey, listen.
Listen up and listen carefully.
I've been to one of their meetings.
It was above a convenience store.
Whose meeting?
Where have you been?
Jeffries, you've been gone damn near two years.
It was a dream.
We live inside a dream.
And it's raining Post Toasties.
Hell, God, baby, damn, no.
I found something in Seattle at Judy's.
And then there they were.
And they sat quietly for hours.
And I followed.
Oh. Oh. Oh.
Ring.
The ring.
Albert, I'll take that second mineral water.
Phillip, let's calm down here,
and get all this interesting story on paper.
Hello? Hello?
Hello? Give me some good news.
Cooper, the device has gone faulty.
Can anybody hear me?
Mayday. Mayday.
May.
February,
1989.
What, am I alone in here?
- He's gone. - What?
GORDON: He's gone. He's gone.
Albert, call the front desk.
I've got the front desk now. He was never here.
And news from Deer Meadow.
Agent Chester Desmond has disappeared.
COOPER: Gordon, what's going on?
He was here.
But where did he go?
And where is Chester Desmond?
[SCREAMING]
Oh Mr. Jeffries.
Santa Maria, where did you go?
Ayudame!
[SCREAMING]